Introducing toys to a hesitant partner

Started by Fantasee, January 04, 2013, 10:43:28 PM

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Fantasee

Has anyone here ever been with someone who is hesitant to use toys? What was your strategy to get them to open up and give it a try? And what was the outcome?

oohyeah

My boyfriend didn't see the point of toys when we got together - I think he was maybe worried that I would come to see them as a replacement for him.  Jealous of a battery-powered rival!  So I gave him a private show with just me and a vibrator and he soon changed his mind!!  ;D  I think it's just a case of showing them that the toy can be used to enhance the experience for both of you, so they feel included.  Now he loves to use it on me during our love-making, so it's worked out well for both of us! 

bumpinButterfly

A private show is a creative way to "introduce" someone. My partner is even a little shier than that. So I got some pictures of the toys I wanted to start with. Then later, I showed him the real things. We finally worked up to trying them.

BetterBare

Hesitant? How about downright bull-stubborn, adamantly opposed? I have to keep my Sybian hidden or the poor man would freak. I wait anxiously for him to go out of town.

Banshee

Quote from: BetterBare on June 10, 2013, 09:39:23 PM
Hesitant? How about downright bull-stubborn, adamantly opposed? I have to keep my Sybian hidden or the poor man would freak. I wait anxiously for him to go out of town.

Oh, wow. He must be incredibly stubborn!

I think some guys have issues with toys because of what oohyeah said - they're worried about being replaced. I think if you hand a guy a toy and let him to do to you what he wants (as long as you're comfortable), he will quickly learn that it isn't a replacement, it's an enhancement.

Shelbylynn

I was actually the one who was hesitant to use toys, but that time has come and gone. I don't know how I would react to a partner who was afraid of a sex toy. A toy and a penis don't feel like the same thing at all! I guess they might not know that though.  ;D